The work an unknown good man has done is like
a vein of water flowing hidden underground,
secretly making the ground green.
Thomas Carlyle
Dr. Phil: Judge William Adams
I usually don't promote daytime television programs. I didn't realize how prescient I was when I last Friday discussed the recent viral video of a Texas judge's 2004 corporal punishment of his then teenage daughter for unauthorized downloads of music and video games from the Internet: "This scenario seems tailor-made for a Dr. Phil McGraw show..."
Today's show featured Hillary and her mother, now divorced from Judge Adams, currently on leave. The judge and the family's youngest child, a tween-aged daughter, did not appear. I realize that this may come too late for readers to see the show (unless the show is repeated in syndication or on cable), but I wasn't aware of promos for the show.
Here is a promotional listing:
WED:The show video is available here
Discipline Video: A Daughter’s New Accusations Against the Judge
ALL-NEW! Texas judge William Adams recently came under fire for a 2004 video that his daughter, Hillary, posted on YouTube, showing Adams whipping the then 16-year-old girl with a belt, despite her pleas to stop. Is this an example of corporal punishment gone too far? And, when does discipline become child abuse?
Let me say to the absent judge: I have not been blessed with the awesome miracle of being the father of two beautiful daughters. But if I was, I would model the virtuous behavior that makes me a better man and make my voice as gentle but sure, as my hands cradling a baby chick or delicate eggs; I would treat my daughter as that rare flower this world will never witness again, parent her with patience and understanding, shine my smile and unconditional paternal love upon her, yet give her all the room she needs to blossom. I would teach her how a good man is and acts, those qualities she should expect no less one day from the father of her own children. And as much as I think I know the answers, I would wait for the questions and learn how to listen, because my answers must fit the person, the miracle she is; and I will accept and admire the integrity of her own decisions, how different they may be. And even when she finally realizes that I am no hero and sometimes fall down, she would see me stand up without complaint or excuse, with confidence, grace and dignity. If she goes away and looks for a way to come back, I would open my arms and speak only of the beauty I behold, which she can't see because her eyes are not old enough.
I don't recall if I previously shared a story involving my baby sister (my first goddaughter). My folks had set up a ping pong table, as I recall in the garage of our old house. I was probably living in Houston at the time, occasionally coming home on visits. Somehow we ended up playing ping pong; I don't think we had played with each other before. Of course, errant balls have to be retrieved; no big deal. But I remember after we finished playing, she turned to me and said, "I like playing with you more than [our middle brother]; he always yells at me when we play." It was an endearing compliment because no one else has said anything like that to me before (or since).
What's interesting is that my middle brother probably has the best interpersonal/office political skills in the family and has been the most successful sibling from a professional standpoint. I had never seen the "ping pong" side of my brother until years later; my brother-in-law was serving in Operation Desert Storm as a medical assistant. My brother and family, living in the north Virginia suburbs of DC, invited me to visit for Christmas; our in-between (14 months younger) sister and 3 young nieces were living in downstate Virginia. I asked him whether he had invited them for Christmas. The odd thing is these siblings once lived together in Beaumont before my sister joined the Air Force as a nurse. We went down to pick them up, and almost immediately our middle niece started crying, missing her daddy. My brother was clearly unnerved by the crying and tried to negotiate with my niece. My sister and I held our tongues; I tried to comfort my 2-year-old goddaughter, and she eventually fell asleep. When we stopped for gas, I asked my sister if she or the girls needed anything, and she suggested animal crackers for my baby niece. My brother saw me feeding the baby cookies and then immediately started having a temper tantrum over potential cookie crumbs in his car. I ignored him; he had no clue how his unreasonable behavior was affecting the rest of us in the car. (I think it probably had something to do with my sister-in-law's high standards.)
It had been a strange experience for me--I had never seen this side of my (3-year-younger) brother, and we had grown up together in the same bedroom, always playing catch, etc. If you ever met us, I'm the direct one, and he's the politician, i.e., always telling you what he thinks you want to hear. (People like that always cause my smoke alarms to go off; it's why I can only endure a few seconds of Barack Obama at a time.) But the real story is these unscripted moments. No doubt Judge Adams puts his best face forward in public, but Hillary caught him in an unscripted moment.
Dr. Phil ended up the episode sounding like he wanted to bring the whole family together for a follow-up episode. I'm not saying Hillary has been an angel in all this; for example, she pays lip service to the fact that it was wrong to download copyrighted materials, but tries to justify it by saying the material was Japanese and not available in the US. She acknowledges that her father had an interest in stopping the illegal file transfer of copyrighted works, but insists he was really more worried about his professional image, not her. She wants the voters to vote her father out of office, even though the voters aren't evaluating how good a father he is--just whether he's a good judge. She admitted that she had been holding onto the video since 2004, biding for the right time to use it against her dad, mocking his computer skills, etc. She clearly needs to deal with how she is responding to the situation (I'm not blaming the victim of what is clearly unacceptable corporal punishment; I'm referring to her responses to her father's and/or other behaviors.) She should live a life worthy of the gift of God she is. She should focus on relationships that reflect positively on the wonderful young woman she is and should acknowledge for herself. Hillary is not defined by any negative images from her father or other difficult people; she should not accept anything less than positive forces in her life worthy of her positive, confident self-image.
The father, on the other hand, (through written statements) notably pointed out the criminal nature of Hillary's file transferring activities, accuses his daughter of playing the victim card with her health condition (i.e., her cerebral palsy is a mild version) and using the tape as a weapon against him. He did admit to losing his temper during the 2004 incident. I don't think the father should comment publicly on her daughter's actions (including the reference to her medical condition) and motives or make excuses for manifestly unjust punishment of his daughter. If he was to say anything about his daughter, it would be to declare his unconditional love for his daughter, take full responsibility for the inappropriate way he dealt with his daughter, and make a public apology. He should acknowledge that whereas corporal punishment may have been effectively used by his parents in raising him, it didn't work with his daughter, and he now realizes that he needs to work on a more effective style in working on the relationships with the members of his family. It's never too late to start being a better dad and rebuild one's relationships with his ex-wife and those two amazing gifts from God, his beautiful daughters.
Joe Paterno:
An Undignified End To A Magnificent Coach's Career
I have not commented on the sad story of the arrest last week of legendary 46-year (and 62-year overall) Penn State Head Football Coach Joe Paterno's long-time former defensive coordinator Jerry Sandusky, whom retired in 1999, arrested last weekend as being an alleged serial pedophile of some 8 boys over 15 years at various facilities. In 2002, then graduate assistant Jerry McQueary caught Sandusky with a 10-year-old boy in a team facility shower. McQueary reported the incident to Paterno. Paterno reportedly informed Athletic Director Tim Curley directly about sexually-suggestive behavior (although McQueary, who had come to the facility to put items in a locker and unexpectedly found the lights on and the showers running, testified that he saw anal sex). The Pennsylvania Attorney General is not holding Paterno responsible for the Penn State failure to report the incident; Curley and another Penn State official, Gary Schultz have been indicted for that failure to report. The investigation seemed to stem from an investigation of a relevant complaint by a victim's mother made in 2009 to the victim's high school where Sandusky served as a volunteer coach.
Paterno, who is expected to be a prosecution witness, had already telegraphed this week his decision to resign at the end of the school year, but the board of trustees decided to terminate Paterno and university president Spanier, effective immediately.
It's likely that Curley and Schultz were worried about scandal at the prestigious institution, not unlike the controversial stonewalling of similar incidents by certain Roman Catholic prelates several years back. It's not unusual for higher-level managers (in this case, the head coach and the university president) to ultimately be held responsible for a wrong that occurred under their watch). Personally, given the fact that Penn State (8-1) has just 3 regular season games left (plus a potential Big 10 championship game and likely bowl game), I would like to have seen the coach to finish his career with a bowl game victory. The fact that he has been cleared of wrongdoing and is a prosecution witness I feel should have been taken into consideration; I think he deserved a better send-off in appreciation for over 6 decades of involvement at the university; I seriously doubt that the university is going to celebrate a fired coach.
Mr. Sandusky will have his day in court. But I have no forgiveness in my heart for any adult whom betrays a child's trust through physical, emotional or sexual abuse or exploitation.
I will say, though, I'm disappointed Joe Paterno didn't do more; for example, when I found the UWM school of business was burying my complaints about a foreign student whom had plagiarized in at least 3 classes under different professors, I went to the university administration, which eventually did take action. Paterno had to know about Sandusky's access to minors at his camps and volunteer activities. If it looked like the university was going to to sit on it, in his place, I would have confidentially called McQueary and told him to go to the police. I would have banned Sandusky's access to any and all team facilities (I don't know if Paterno did this). I don't think I could sleep at night imagining the next victim's face and his voice saying to me, "Why didn't you say something, Coach?" But that's me. I think children are gifts from God. Paterno has to live the rest of his life knowing 7 years after he was told of Sandusky's questionable behavior, it took the courage of a victim's mother to come forward. How can Coach Paterno look at that mother in the eye and explain to her why Sandusky wasn't already in prison versus assaulting her son?
The Congressman Walsh Rant: Thumbs UP!
But.... No Coffee For You!
(I'm hoping people remember the Seinfeld Soup Nazi...)
The insane obsession with the banks seems to reflect that if you keep repeating the same disingenuous populist line, people believe it. I mean, this has been going on since Jefferson was bashing banks in the Washington Administration. Now you would think--if banks are doing so well, bank investors must be raking in big profits, right? WRONG! As Walsh correctly points out, the issue isn't so much with the banks as with dysfunctional government regulations, incompetent regulators and morally hazardous guarantees (which effectively transfer risk from the private to the public sector). Are there some bad banks that go bankrupt? Of course. There are also green energy companies, retail and restaurant chains, and businesses of many kinds that go bankrupt.
This is not a financial blog, but let me point out investors are not so much concerned about current earnings as sustainable future earnings. Banks and other financial stocks are performing badly AS A GROUP. I have not personally bought bank stocks in my retirement savings accounts in quite some time.
Let me excerpt from a recent IBD editorial:
The Washington Post asserted that "Wall Street" has amassed more profits in the first 2 1/2 years of the Barack Obama presidency than in all eight of George W. Bush's... Stocks of money-center banks are among this year's weakest performers: they rank 195th among the 197 subgroups tracked by IBD. Investment brokers rank just above the bottom 20, in the 177th spot...No fewer than 14 of the 20 worst-performing groups in the list above are either heavily regulated or controlled by the government: (among them) medical subgroups, automakers, tire and original equipment manufacturers, and solar.Notice the inverse relationship between government regulation and profitable businesses? Here's an investment strategy: buy a put option on any industry or group that Obama wants to "invest" in. Let's see: he now seems particularly interested in construction companies, small businesses, etc. (PS. I'm being sarcastic here; I don't dispense financial advice in this blog.)
Political Humor
"The White House says there is no evidence at all that earth has been visited by aliens. Do you believe that? We can't even find aliens sneaking across the border." - Jay Leno
[Governor Jerry "Moonbeam" Brown (D-CA) was disappointed; his alien gardener had told him, in a heavy accent, that he was from the planet Klingon. What tipped off ICE was the fact that the gardener claimed to have voted for Brown in the last election. So much for claims of higher intelligence...]
An original:
- Sharon Bialek, who claims that she rebuffed Herman Cain's unwanted advances, said that Cain seemed confused: the former Godfather's Pizza (and then current NRA) CEO thought that he had made the then unemployed former NRA employee an offer she couldn't refuse.
Foreigner, "Jukebox Hero". Similar songs embedded below: Loverboy's "The Kid Is Hot Tonite" and the Bay City Rollers' "Yesterday's Hero".
